As this week’s parsha begins, Jacob is at a crossroads. Having built a successful life for himself, he is ready to return to his homeland with his family; to take on the responsibility of the spiritual legacy promised to his grandfather, and father, and now to him.
Yet, old demons and fears die hard. To safely and strongly face the path ahead, Jacob must first face his brother and move past long ago anger and hurt they both hold.
Jacob tries his best to prepare; he plans for ways to preserve at least some of his family should something go wrong by dividing them into two camps. He sends gifts to his brother.
He then goes off on his own to prepare – to conquer his fears and find his direction. Jacob wrestles throughout the night – whether with G-d, an angel, another unknown man, his brother, or with himself is an oft-discussed topic among scholars.
Whoever his opponent was, the encounter seems to have had an impact. Jacob appears a changed man by morning. His leg is wrenched and he has trouble walking, yet, we are told that he goes forward towards his brother with confidence.
Each one of us wrestles with issues throughout our life. We face challenges, struggle with relationships, difficult situations, and our own next life steps. We have moments we toss and turn throughout the night. Sometimes our wrestling leads to new insights.
At other times, we are so consumed by our problems that we feel stuck. Afraid to take a misstep, we bury the worry and plod through our days. Yet, we feel lethargic as the problem continues to weigh us down.
Jacob took a bold step in facing his own missteps and his fears. He could not know the outcome, yet he could decide how he would move through it. Plan, and courage in hand, he took a deep breath and stepped forward. Even a pain in his hip could not hold him back.
Just as Jacob took steps forward after wrestling with his deepest worries throughout the night, may each one of us take time to face our worries, think through our options, and make decisions to move forward with dignity, grace, and courage.
- May My (and Your) Yom Kippur Be Filled Meaning - October 3, 2014
- We All Are Standing Here.. Now What Will You Do? - September 19, 2014
- ‘Tis the Season of Transitions - September 12, 2014