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August 14, 2011

Eikev Limerick

This week’s parasha continues with Moses’ admonition to the Israelites not to forget the lessons learned during the 40 years of wandering in the wilderness. In particular, it addresses the concept of hubris: understanding that any successes and/or failures in the land are directly the results of God’s reward or punishment. When you’ve tasted the […]

Rabbi Joe Black
Filed Under: Torah Limericks

August 7, 2011

Vaetchanan

This week’s parasha is the Motherlode. It contains, arguably, the most important Jewish texts in the Torah -the Shema and Aseret Ha-Dibrot– the Ten Commandments. Moses continues with his review of the journeys of the Israelites – reminding us that even though he will not enter into the of Canaan himself, we still need to […]

Rabbi Joe Black
Filed Under: Torah Limericks

August 5, 2011

Torah Commentary – Devarim

We have become accustomed to studying Portions where God speaks through Moses, but in Devarim, the first Portion in the Book of Deuteronomy (Sefer Devarim), Moses speaks on his own. Moses is fully aware that this is his final chance to address the children of Israel; that his death is imminent; that he won’t be […]

Ronni Sims
Filed Under: Kfar HaMorim

August 1, 2011

Making Theatre is Kind of A Dumb Thing To Do

OK, all kidding aside, it’s very important that all of you come see my show when it opens. Not just because the actors are amazing (which they are), and the director is brilliant (which he is) and the writer is halfway decent (name rhymes with Flakespear- and I don’t mean Blake Steer, renowned Cherokee porn star). You should all come because I’ve been working my ass off on this show for no money or hope of professional advancement and I need as many people as possible to validate this incredibly stupid and self destructive life choice that I’ve made. Again. This, BTW, is actually the subtext of most peer-to-peer grassroots arts marketing – in fact, you could change of names of most shows in LA to “Somebody Tell Me I’m Not Wasting My Life” or “Hug Me- I’m Broke!”

Milk in a Bag!I’ve been making theatre for most of my life. I founded my first theatre company in 3rd grade in Arad, Israel. For those unfamiliar with Arad (i.e. anyone reading this who’s name does not include the word “Sims”) it’s the sort of idyllic small town that Norman Rockwell would have dreamed of if he fell asleep on the toilet after eating some bad schwarma sold to him by sleezy Russian immigrants. There were three of us in the company, so we called ourselves Ha Shlishia- which, loosely translated from the Hebrew means, “The Three” (pretty fucking clever for a bunch of 8 year olds, if you ask me). As our fame grew, so did our aspirations. We expanded by leaps and bounds- fast becoming Ha Revieya (“the Four”) and, at the peek of our success, Ha Hameshia (“The Five”.) Tragically, we lost two members due to artistic differences over action figures (Boba Fett was our Yoko Ono) and were back to being Ha Shlishia. (Fortunately we weren’t in the American public school system, so addition and subtraction were no problem for us.) It didn’t matter, though- we were Rock Stars- bold, brash and out of control- guzzling chocolate milk by the bagful (don’t look at me- they sell it that way) , wolfing down Krembo (phallic Third World Malomars) and fighting off the girls with a stick (mostly because they wanted to play Smurfs with us and that was NOT fucking happening.)

Eric Sims
Filed Under: DiaTribe

August 1, 2011

Devarim Limerick

Devarim- the final frontier. The Moses who first told God: “I am not a man of words,” concludes his life-mission with four dramatic and passionate sermons- his last words to the people before he leaves them to enter the Promised Land without him Moses knew his life soon would be ended His record he thus […]

Rabbi Joe Black
Filed Under: Torah Limericks

July 31, 2011

Torah Commentary – Mas’ei

In the days before GPS devices, you could prepare for a trip by going to the AAA office and requesting a “TripTik.” A TripTik was a series of maps bound together and hi-lited to show your route from your house to your destination. The Torah Portion, Mas’ei, the final Portion in the Book of Numbers […]

Ronni Sims
Filed Under: Kfar HaMorim

July 26, 2011

Torah Commentary – Matot

The Torah Portion, Mattot, opens with God’s commandment that: “A man who will make a vow to YHWH or has sworn an oath to make a restriction on himself shall not desecrate his word. He shall do it according to everything that comes out of his mouth.” (Numbers 30:3)* As with all Torah Portions, Mattot, […]

Ronni Sims
Filed Under: Kfar HaMorim

July 26, 2011

Mas’ey Limerick

This weeks Parasha, Mas’ey, begins with a travelogue, of sorts. Moses lists all of the places where the Israelites have encamped up to this point. It then switches gears and Moses relays God’s command to destroy all of the remnants of the Caananites in the land of Israel – both people and religious shrines. It […]

Rabbi Joe Black
Filed Under: Torah Limericks

July 25, 2011

Summertime, and the Living is Miserable

It’s 100 degrees here in Camp Ramah in the Berkshires. It’s sweltering, humid, buggy and dusty. Pretty miserable. But then, miserable is just what high summer should be on the Jewish calendar. This week we marked the 17th of Tammuz, the minor fast day marking the date when a number of mythic calamities befell Israel, […]

Rabbi Jeremy Kalmanofsky
Filed Under: Honest To God

July 18, 2011

Mattot Limerick

This week’s parsha, Mattot, has some difficult passages. It contains the laws of vows and the consequences for failing to carry them out. It also speaks about how women are not responsible for fulfilling vows if their husbands or fathers do not want them to. We then plunge head first into battle with the Midianites- […]

Rabbi Joe Black
Filed Under: Torah Limericks

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Rabbi Joe Black
Rabbi Black is Senior Rabbi of Temple Emanuel in Denver, Colorado. Prior to moving to Denver, he served as Senior Rabbi of Congregation Albert in Albuquerque, New Mexico from 1996-2010,and as Assistant then Associate Rabbi of Temple Israel in Minneapolis, Minnesota from 1987- 1996. He is married and has two children.Rabbi Joe Black is one of the most popular Jewish contemporary artists in the United States. He has been a featured performer at the Coalition for Alternatives in Jewish Education (CAJE) Conference as well as the Biennial Conventions of the Union for Reform Judaism. He has shared his music with hundreds of Jewish communities around the United States and Canada. He also has been featured in many acoustic music venues around the country. Rabbi Black has been honored as one of the “Top Ten Artists” in both the categories of “Jewish Children’s Music” and “Male, Adult Contemporary Jewish Music” by Moment Magazine and TARA Publications. His recordings have received accolades from sources as diverse asThe New York Times, Haddasah Magazine, Parent’s Choice, The American Library Journal and Kids First: The Coalition for Quality Children’s Video. While living in Chicago, he hosted the Emmy award winning television program, The Magic Door on WBBM TV.
Latest posts by Rabbi Joe Black (see all)
  • Vayikra Limerick – March 14, 2013
  • A new Purim Limerick for a divided Congress. – February 21, 2013
  • A New Tu B’Shvat Limerick – January 25, 2013

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